Sunday, April 23, 2017

Listen Up! Our Infertility Story

This week is National Infertility Awareness Week. Since infertility is part of our story to building our family, I wanted to share some information this week. I know that infertility is not everyone's struggle, but it is a struggle that 1 in 8 couples face. So there is a high likelihood that either you or someone you know have faced the devastating news that your hopes and plans to build a family may not happen like you thought. And because so many struggle in silence, I wanted to take some time to bring awareness to this issue.

I have shared our story here on the blog, but thought I would share the brief{ish} version today. So if you would be so kind as to listen up! Because we would like to share our story. {Ok- totally cheesy, but trying to go with the theme here...not my favorite theme, but we'll go with it}  :)


July 2011: Mike and I got married and pursued ministry in McKinney.

September 2012: We decided we were ready to grow our family.

December 2012: I was diagnosed with Crohn's Disease {which put everything on hold}.

May 2013: Jesus graciously allowed me to achieve remission and we got the green light to start our family!

May 2014: We tried for the obligatory year without any success, so I went to see my OBGYN who gave us our initial infertility diagnosis and referred us to an RE.

August 2014: After months of testing, we received our final infertility diagnosis- we had less than 1% chance of conceiving on our own and our only hope was IVF with ICSI, and even then we were not given great odds. We chose to pursue Embryo Adoption instead.

October 2014: We mailed off our application to Nightlight Christian Adoptions and started the journey toward Embryo Adoption!

January 2015: I had a laparoscopy to remove what they thought was a blockage in my fallopian tube. Instead, they found Stage IV Endometriosis and a cyst. Thankfully, they were able to remove it all.

April 2015: Contracts were finalized and 6 embryos became legally ours!

June 2015: Our embryos {finally} shipped to our clinic, and we officially started our first transfer cycle.

August 2015: We transferred our next 2 embryos, but lost our remaining 2 embryos in the thawing process. We were elated to find out we were pregnant!

September 2015: Unfortunately, we miscarried and were left wondering what God was doing.

October 2015: We decided to try for another match, so we began that process again with Nightlight.

January 2016: Contracts were finalized and 4 new embryos became legally ours! This shipping process was A LOT faster, so our embryos shipped to our clinic this month too.

February/March 2016: We transferred 2 more embryos and were elated {but cautious} to find out we were pregnant with TWINS!

November 2016: Eli and Maddie were born!


This is BY FAR the condensed version, but from start to finish, it was 1,524 days. From the time we decided we were ready to grow our family to the moment we held Eli and Maddie in our arms. And yes, I was counting. I was desperately trying to cling to Jesus, but this was such a dark time for me. So many questions, so much disappointment, hurt, loss. Looking back over these events, I can remember the pain and the struggle as if it was yesterday. 

Yes, we are now "on the other side." We get to hold and snuggle our long prayed-for babies, and it would be so easy to lose infertility in our rearview mirror. And there is a part of me that wants to leave all of that pain and hurt behind and never think of it again. But the reality is that infertility never really leaves you. Those scars still remain, and there are always glimpses of our struggle that crop up again. But I know the Lord wants to use our story of pain and struggle for His glory. I don't want to forget our journey, because I want to be able to speak into someone else's if I can. I want to pray for the things I know their hearts need. Because the Lord was faithful to provide that when we needed it most. 

So today I share a piece of our story, in hopes that someone feels a little less alone in their struggle. I pray that the Lord uses our story to encourage others in their journey. No two journeys are alike, but the God I serve is the same yesterday, today, and tomorrow. I want more than anything for the 1 in 8 to know the depths of God's goodness, faithfulness, and sufficiency. Because even if we didn't have Eli and Maddie, He would still be good. Even if we were still waiting, He would still be showing Himself faithful in the midst of our struggle. And even if He chose to close the door to parenthood for us, He is all that we would need. 

You are not alone, and He has not forgotten you. 

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