she · nan · i · gans | shə-'na-ni-gənz
noun
silly or high-spirited behavior; mischief
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Our latest "adventure" has been Eli and Maddie's rebellion during nap time. Maddie has struggled with staying in her bed since she climbed out of her crib last Fall. It took almost 2 months to get her to actually stay in her bed. And it was nice while it lasted...
Our problem now is that Eli has now joined in on the antics. Before, Maddie was really the only one being crazy, but if we could calm Eli down, then she'd get bored and go to sleep. Now though, he thinks nap time is play time, so it's just crazytown in there, once I close the door. Again, Maddie shows zero willpower to stay in her bed, and she is out the second the door closes. Eli won't get out of his own bed, but just in case you think he's an innocent party, know that he is the one coaxing her over to his bed, saying "Maddie, get out of your bed!"
It would be totally ok for them to play in their room if 1) they were quiet about it, and 2) they didn't desperately still need a nap. They can't play and talk quietly to each other, so we can listen to their sweet conversations over the monitor like all those other twin moms talk about. Nope. They have to wrestle and jump and scream and throw and bang and kick and basically act like lunatics. Because I still have another child in the house who is trying to sleep, and 2 sound machines don't seem to be enough to cover the twin antics. And said twins still need their nap. Because when they don't get a nap...well, it's not pretty in our house between the hours of 4 and 7pm.
So we're trying to find the balance of letting them talk and play {quietly}, but also keeping them from acting like fools for the entire duration of nap. The other hard part of these current shenanigans is that we are struggling with discipline and obedience overall. Turns out, my children are pretty stubborn. They don't like consequences {who does?} but we haven't quite found what works for them yet. I mean, what else can you do when timeout doesn't work and you have literally taken everything away from them??
No joke. We took away their "stuffies" they sleep with, their blankets, their pillows. All the fun things we had planned {walks, playing outside after nap, eating popsicles, etc.} And we recently took away all of their toys. Mike pulled out most of them, and they were not allowed to play with their toys after nap. They had to sit on a square and watch Aiden play with all their toys. Which they hated. So we {naively} thought, "oh, this is going to sink in!"
We {or at least I} felt like mean parents, but you have to stick to what you say, right?? Yeah, well, this worked for one day. And then they were back to WWE hour. So my mom suggested separating them. Which, we have avoided, simply because we don't have another place for another child to sleep. But desperate times...
So we're on day 2 of pulling Eli out of the room and making him sleep on a pallet on the living room floor. Which is highly inconvenient for us, so we're really hoping this is a phase. And a quick one at that. Thankfully, they both fall asleep within 10-15 minutes of being away from each other {at least the last couple of days}, so that certainly seems to be the ticket. Eli seems a little happy and relieved to be apart, so I'm not sure he's registering the separation as a consequence haha. Maddie definitely does NOT like being separated from Eli; she told me through toddler tears, "Mommy, I want Eli to come back to me!" Talk about breaking your heart!
Parenting is hard. Parenting twin toddlers is really hard. It is taking all of my patience and strength and brain power right now. I was a {fairly} obedient child, so I just don't understand not doing what Mommy and Daddy tell you to do. All day, every day, repeat x1000. I know their little brains can't remember what I said 2 minutes ago, but man is it frustrating. I realize how quickly I am triggered by a tiny 3-year old human who simply says "no" haha.
It's my job to teach them how to obey, and I desperately want them to know the joys and peace of an obedient heart. But I also want them to want to obey and not just avoid consequences. It's such a hard balance, and I know there are a lot of steps in the process as they learn and grow. As I, sinful Mama, learn and grow. Because I am learning how much I want to just control their behavior in the moment, and I have to remember that I am shepherding little hearts. For the long term. THIS is the hard work of parenting, of training little people to know and follow Jesus. Of remembering that only God can do the real heart work, that I have to be surrendered to the Lord if I have any hope of imparting knowledge and training to them. And we all need so much grace in that process.
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