Christmas Bucket List :: Make Gingerbread People

Ok, so I definitely cheated on this one because we don't have an oven :)

I found these little gingerbread kits at Dollar Tree, and the kids loved decorating them. Hopefully, we will be able to make real gingerbread people next year!

Christmas Countdown Chain + Ornaments

These art projects were a little bit more the kiddos' speed. We just used construction paper to make the paper chain, and because it's the cheap dollar store kind, we had to use tape instead of glue. But the kids didn't seem to mind- they just liked having their turn! So far, when we take a chain off, the kids ask why we're taking it apart haha. I don't think they quite understand the idea of counting down, but we'll see if they catch on at some point before Christmas :)

For the ornaments, I bought this kit at Hobby Lobby for 50% off, so it was a $4 project {$1.33 per kid}, so I would say it was well worth the money! There were more than enough ornaments and plenty of supplies to decorate them, and it was just easy, peel-and-stick pieces. It brings a little extra festivity to our little extended stay, and it will be the one and only time we can enjoy a project with a little glitter :)

{Crohn's Awareness} :: My #IBDVisible Story

It's Crohn's and Colitis Awareness Week, and this will be my 8th year to participate. The last 7 years, I have been able to raise awareness while in remission. This year, however, my IBD story is more tangible, as I am fighting to get back to remission. 

{IBD = Irritable Bowel Disease = Crohn's and Colitis ≠ IBS}

This year's focus is exploring what it's like to spend a day in the life of patients, caregivers, healthcare professionals, researchers, and other members of the IBD community. Everyone experiences their disease differently, and no one day looks the same for each patient. So if you meet someone with Crohn's and learn their story, it could look completely different from someone else with Crohn's. 

As I recently mentioned, I have seen progress in my healing, but it has been slow. Just a few short weeks ago, I was experiencing these symptoms on a daily basis. As recently as last week, I was experiencing my symptoms several times throughout the week. But even this week has seen some setbacks. So while I have seen progress {and I am SO thankful}, I still have a long way to go before I am actually feeling better. And after an entire year of flaring, my body is pretty exhausted. Being sick all the time definitely takes a toll physically, but it also wears on me mentally and emotionally. I'm fighting hard to find healing, but there are a lot of really tough days right now.

The longer I go without being in remission and still experiencing symptoms, the more damage that is happening to my insides. And that makes me really nervous. Because that means complications, hospital visits, surgeries... and when I think too much about it, it can feel overwhelming and just plain scary. It can be frustrating, knowing that I am doing everything I am "supposed" to be doing, and yet not seeing the progress I should. And it's just hard having to start over with my healthcare provider. I have had the same doctor since my diagnosis, and I trusted him completely. Starting over with someone new, in the middle of trying to heal, is not how I envisioned things happening.

I think one of the hardest things about my healing right now is the fact that I'm a mom. Moms don't have time to be sick. When I was sick back in 2012, I was working full time, but I could sit quietly at my desk, make it through the day, then go home and crawl into bed. Now, there is no sitting quietly, no resting, no break. Mike does his best to help, for sure, but he has to go to work. And my kiddos still need me; it's just that tough life stage where being a mom is very physically demanding. They don't understand that climbing on top of Mommy hurts, or that resting, even for a moment, is a glorious {and much needed} thing haha. They have endless energy, and I basically have none right now.

They do know that Mommy has Crohn's and that my stomach hurts a lot. And as all moms of toddlers know, going to the bathroom is a group event, so they spend a lot of time with me, camped out on the bathroom floor, waiting for Mommy. Whenever I go to the bathroom now, even if it's not related to my Crohn's, Aiden stands next to me, puts his hand on my leg and pats it gently, while saying "Mommy go potty. It's ok, Mommy." It's just about the sweetest thing, and it makes all the difference when I really don't feel well. 

I'm thankful for doctors and medicine and insurance. I'm thankful for a husband who tries his best to give me breaks to rest. I'm thankful that my symptoms are {mostly} better than they were 2 months ago. I am praying for healing, both from this current flare, and from the disease entirely {currently, there is no cure}. I am praying that this medicine helps put me back into remission, and keeps me there for a long time. I am praying that my new doctor in Virginia is a good fit for many years to come. And I am praying for the Lord's strength to make it through these hard days. I knew my health was never guaranteed; now that I'm back in this place, it makes me that much more grateful for the years of health I did {and hopefully do} experience. 

Christmas Bucket List :: Make Paper Snowflakes

Since we don't have our Christmas decorations this year, I decided to make a few of our own! This might have been a little overly ambitious on Mommy's part {my kids don't really know how to use scissors yet...so why did I think they could cut out snowflakes??} Turns out, even the blunt kid scissors can be fairly dangerous, so maybe we'll tackle that skill a little later...like when I can have more adults around to guard eyeballs. I am happy to report that everyone still has all of their fingers {and eyeballs}.

While the actual making of the snowflakes presented a bit of a challenge, the kids LOVED putting the snowflakes up on the window in our hotel room. They were so excited to show Daddy their fun snowflake surprise :)

Advent 2020

I feel like I could use some time to pause and take a breath. Anyone else?

2020 has been quite a year. So I have been looking forward to celebrating Advent. A time of expectant waiting and preparation for Christ's coming. A time to pause and reflect, focus my attention on the coming Light. In a lot of ways, it feels like all we have been doing for months is waiting. Waiting for the curve to flatten. Waiting for a vaccine. Waiting for life to return to normal. Waiting to feel better. But that waiting feels so futile and endless, and the positive results we want are definitely not guaranteed. Contrast that with the joy and anticipation of Advent. We have the benefit of celebrating a sure thing, the coming of the Messiah over 2000 years ago. And while we still wait and groan, we have the assurance of His second coming. That gives me so much peace and joy in the midst of a year like 2020.

Since all of our Christmas things are packed away in our PODS, we don't have our Jesse Tree. I also don't have easy access to a printer to even have a makeshift advent calendar. So we are doing something new! I ordered The Christmas Promise book and calendar, and we will read through the little devotions each night. While I definitely miss our usual reading plan and want to keep up that tradition, it's kind of fun to have something different this year.

Personally, I am walking through the Hymns for Advent devotional from The Daily Grace Co. I really enjoy hymns, and it's fun to walk through the history of these Christmas ones, while also looking more deeply at the lyrics.