All I Need

Happy New Year! So we have finally arrived at the year 2007. I have to say it's kind of surreal. I never thought this year would come. You know when you are a kid, college-aged people seem so old. When I was a kid, I remember thinking how I would be 22 when I graduated from college in the year 2007...and that seemed so far away to me. And yet, here I am. I don't feel old. Far from it, actually.  Now that I am here, it doesn't seem like what it would be when I imagined it as a kid. I feel like I should feel older than I really do, though. It's kind of a weird feeling. Anywho...

 

So what's for me in 2007? No clue. LOL. One more semester in school. Graduation in May. Hopefully a new job. A new life. I feel like I am standing at the base of a huge mountain; I feel overwhelmed by the sheer magnitude of changes before me. They are looming in the very near future and it scares the crap out of me. But I am beginning to feel that tiny pinch of excitement about it.  I just have to get to the point where the excitement outweighs the fear. The whole job search thing is too much for me to think about right now, but I know I need to. No one in BEST can believe I haven't even started. Haha. When I think about my personality, I can hardly believe it myself. But 18 hours, group projects, working, leading a community group, Prague nearly killed me last semester...there simply was no time to think about jobs. And over Christmas break, job hunting was the last thing I wanted to be doing after such a hectic semester. I needed time to breathe. But now the new semester is getting ready to start and I need to start thinking about it. I will let you know what God decides to share with me regarding all of that. Somehow, given my past circumstances, I don't think this will be a simple thing. There will be lots of prayer, tears, stress, faith involved.

 

When I was thinking about new years resolutions, I decided not to have any. Haha. There is logic behind that...why make a resolution only at the beginning of the year? Why only because it's January 1? Why not whenever you feel God poking at you in some area of your life? While I don't have any official resolutions, I still will face this semester as one of new beginnings. My heart's desire practically every day is to spend more time with Him. The other day, I actually woke up with a deep yearning to spend time with Him. The apartment was quiet and I was not rushing off somewhere. In the stillness, I heard God's invitation. And so I spent time with Him thinking about "resolutions" if you will...

 

I want to ache for God. I want to ache for Him in such a way that I cannot find peace until I spend time with Him. I want to perceive things the way Christ perceives them; I want to think the way Christ would think; I want to do what Christ would do. I want to fulfill my calling- to become an "everlasting splendor." I long for the kind of peace and joy that characterizes the lives of seasoned and godly Christians. I want to become the woman God created me to be. I want God to show me this semester what He had in mind when He created me. I want to be content with where God has me. I want to be content with it being just me and God. I want to be able to say with complete honesty and sincerity that He is all I need.

 

Every semester, God is faithful to give me a song that is my "semester song." It is one that I strive to live my life by that semester. Ever faithful, this is what He has provided for me:

 

When the day is done

And there’s no one else around

While I’m lying here in bed

You’re in my heart, You’re in my head

You’re all I need

You’re all I need

 

There are a million voices

Calling out my name

You’re the one I want to hear

So make the others disappear

You’re all I need

You’re all I need

 

You are all I need when I’m surrounded

You are all I need if I’m by myself

Fill me when I’m empty

There is nothing else

You’re all I need

 

When the morning comes

And Your mercy is renewed

There’s a fire in my bones

I’m not afraid to go alone

You’re all I need

You’re all I need

 

The sun on my face

I hear you whisper loud

Still the God who opens seas

Every flower, even me

You’re all I need

You’re all I need

 

You are all I need when I’m surrounded

You are all I need if I’m by myself

Fill me when I’m empty

There is nothing else

You’re all I need

 

He is all I need...

 

 

Currently Reading: The Life You've Always Wanted, by John Ortberg