We have been so busy the last couple of months, that I have hardly had any time for my dear little blog. Hardly any time to provide our normal life updates. So it has been awhile since I provided any updates on my health stuff.
Not that anyone is desperate for an update...but I like to keep my own records so I can look back on my own health journey ;)
Crohn's
As a quick recap...I was able to declare remission for Crohn's back in May. I had been feeling pretty good on that front, but at the end of September, I found myself in the middle of a flare. And I have to admit that it was really tough. It lasted almost 2 weeks, and it didn't matter what I ate. And all of the stress and fear and hardship of those 3 years of sickness came flooding back. I had been well for just 4 short months, and now it felt like it was all fading away again. It was really hard not to feel overwhelmed, like it was all over, and that it all meant that remission was over.
Thankfully the flare passed, but now I am wary. And waiting for when the next flare might come. And I really hate living in this place again. When I achieved remission on Humira, I experienced periodic flares, but they didn't last quite as long, and they didn't happen so close after achieving remission. So I am scared, and I have to constantly take my fears to the Lord, trusting that He is still in control. I know He is, but I just don't want to go back. I know He is good, even if He does take me back...but I'm wrestling a lot with that right now, so could use a lot of prayer on that.
Also, super random: I have mentioned before how Crohn's affects more than just your GI tract, and for me, I have seen inflammation in my gums. I have been fighting that inflammation for several months, and most recently was recommended a prescription toothpaste to try to help. The dentist said I have healthy teeth and healthy gums, but this inflammation {which manifests in bleeding gums...so how is that healthy??} just hasn't calmed down...hence, prescription toothpaste. Crohn's. Is. Ridiculous.
Migraines
Back in July, I was still struggling with the migraine medication that the neurologist put me on. My migraines had decreased in intensity, but I was still getting a headache almost every day. So when I met with her in August, she immediately moved me to a new medication. The complication was insurance. In order to put me on more migraine-specific medication, I have to try 2 medications first {the first one I was on was a beta-blocker, and the one I am on now is actually an anti-seizure medication}. Once I give those a worthy try, then insurance is more likely to approve the more expensive drugs. I get how the game is played, but it doesn't make it any less frustrating.
She did warn me that this second medication was not her favorite {awesome}. It tends to have less-than-wonderful side effects, but if I could stick it out, then I might have access to some better options. So I agreed to give it a shot. The main side effect that people complain about is that it makes them feel kind of spacey and makes it hard to focus and concentrate. While I have certainly struggled with that, I don't feel like it has been as bad as I anticipated. So I'm really thankful for that. Do I like walking into a room and forgetting why, or taking twice as long to think about the task I am working on? Not really. But it makes me more intentional, and it's not that much worse than my usual tired mom-brain, so I can't really complain.
Another side effect is that it can make you more emotional. And I have seen an uptick in my emotions. So I basically don't trust them right now. I cry more often, blame the medication, and wait a few days before I respond to situations {if I even do at all}. Which, honestly, is not a bad practice. Other than that, I have experienced on-and-off numbness in my arms and legs, which is a truly bizarre feeling. I have lost the weight I gained on the last medication, and the insomnia is also gone {praise Jesus!}
While I could do without side effects, they have been manageable enough for the benefits to my migraines. I have definitely seen a huge improvement! I would love the magic pill that gets rid of ALL my migraines. I would love to go weeks or months without having another one. But the goal on the preventive medications is to reduce headache days by 50%. So since I was at 18-25 headache days a month, we're trying to achieve only 9-13 headache days a month. And I have definitely seen that with this medication.
It's still hard, because that has still meant about 1 migraine a week; the pain is bad enough that I have to take my rescue med. And I usually end up having to do that 2 days in a row. And that's the max I can take in a week. So if I get more than 1 migraine a week, I'm out of luck and have to power through. Thankfully that hasn't happened as often lately. But it is crazy to think that 1 migraine a week is progress and success! But when I think back to where I was... I am just so thankful for how far the Lord has brought me. That this new preventive medication is working better, with more manageable side effects, and that I have that glorious rescue med.
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In the busyness, I have learned that I have been pushing my body to its limits, and it's not a good thing. Since I achieved remission, I was ready to return to pre-sickness life, and I dove all in to all the things. And I have learned that I just can't go back to that level of activity. While that is frustrating in some ways, I am realizing how the Lord has gently been reminding me to slow down, step back, choose differently. So I will be fulfilling some commitments through the end of the year, but then adjusting our schedules a bit for the Spring. I just have to make different choices, even in a "healthy" state, especially if I want to stay healthy. But even aside from my health, I feel like we have just been running from activity to activity, and we have lost a good balance in our lives. So it will be good to find a better, more healthy rhythm for all of us in the Spring. We just have to survive the craziness of the rest of this year ;)
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