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Thursday, December 29, 2022

Embryo Adoption :: Our Journey {2022}

I didn't blog at all about Embryo Adoption in 2022! But that's not because it hasn't been on my mind...

I have actually thought a lot about it this year. Our story, how grateful I am for my sweet snowflake babies, how the Lord provided in ways we never could have imagined. Five years ago this month, we had our last frozen embryo transfer, and it's hard to believe that it has been that long since we were wrapping up our journey to building our family. Five years ago this month, we "met" our precious Aiden for the first time through a microscope, and we were praying that we would get to hold him in our arms.

But as the kids get older and start asking more questions and having a deeper understanding of their origins, my mind has started to shift to what their response and feelings will be toward it all. I have spent a lot of time reading the stories of donor-conceived persons, and while I have gleaned some valuable information, it has also been a little disheartening. Most of the hardship comes from the unethical nature of the entire fertility industry and the secrecy surrounding so many people's origins {something I also take issue with}. Thankfully, we have no plans to keep information from our kids, and we can use these stories to have better conversations with them. But there is a large contingency of donor-conceived people who find embryo adoption abhorrent, the worst of the industry. And while I am trying to learn and understand their perspectives, it's a hard place to be as someone who became a Mama because of, what I view as the gift of, embryo adoption. 

I am thankful that I don't have to process my children's stories solely through the lens of a {legitimately} broken and hurting group of donor conceived people. I can lean on the power and redemption of the gospel and how that {more importantly} shapes my children's identities. I can recognize the sovereign hand of God in our family's story and rest in the fact that He alone will direct their paths, however they view their origins. But gosh, I really don't want to get this wrong...

Eli and Maddie have just now started asking about where babies come from, asking questions about how they were in Mommy's tummy, and how {exactly} they came out haha. As I even look ahead to 1st grade history and science and all the topics we will cover, I know more of these conversations will start to come up. And I just want to be ready for them. So I am learning to lean on Jesus and dig into His word for wisdom. Because I know He will be faithful to give it.


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